Random Kingdom Talk Show: Season II
by we are anonymous we are legion
Summary: WE'RE BAAAACK! let the tor-i mean show begin!
1. beginning

a/n

a/n

WE'RE BAAAACK!!

_**Disclaimer:**___I own nothing but myself and Yamata, Shiro, plus Doom/Resident-Evil-no-Jutsu.

end a/n

KoR, Shiro, and Hanabi are on the same set as the original talk show that we did, with new sets of Fangirls and Fanboys.

KoR: (imitating Dr. Evil) start the machine! (again!)

Hanabi: (imitating Frey) START THE MACHINE! (again!)

(with all of the Inuyasha characters)

-ZAP-

(with Naruto, Hinata, and every other Naruto character but Hanabi)

-zap-

(with all of the Final Fantasy 7,10, and 12 series characters)

-ZAP-

(with all of the Kingdom Hearts Characters)

-ZAP-

(with Strong Bad at his PC)

-SB is about to check and answer an email when…-

SB: -just about to type in his email account and password when…-

-ZAP-

(with all of the Code Grass characters)

-ZAP-

(with the "Duke Boys" and Daisy Duke with their car, the _General Lee_)

Bo: you broke the moonshine…which side do you want it? Right or left?

Luke: -sigh- left—

Bo: -whacks Luke upside the head with the VERY thick Duke family phonebook-

Daisy: -- ooh! That's gotta hurt!

Uncle Jesse: -comes in from nowhere while holding three cases of moonshine, sees Luke on the ground and Bo holding the phonebook- OO _…took the words right out of my mouth…_

-ZAP-

(with DETHKLOK)

-they are playing "Awaken" on a "DETHipod"…-

DETHipod: Musta-Krakish,  
Musta-Krakish,

The time has come, to awaken him.

I call upon the ancient lords of the underworld,  
To bring forth this beast and,

Awaken, awaken, awaken, awaken,  
Take the land, that must be taken.  
Awaken, awaken, awaken, awaken,  
Devour worlds, smite forsaken

Rise up from your thousand year-old sleep,  
Break forth from your grave eternally.

I command you to rise, rise, rise, rise,  
rise, rise, rise, rise.

I'm the conjurer of demons,  
I'm the father of your death.

I bring forth the ancient evil,  
I control his every breath.

I instigate your misfortune,  
With the birth of killing trolls.

I awaken Armageddon,  
Feeding on a thousand souls.

Awaken,  
Awaken,  
Awaken,  
Awaken,

_Solo_

Musta-Krakish, (Musta)  
Musta-Krakish, (Musta)  
Musta-Krakish, (Musta)  
Musta-Krakish, (Musta),

Musta-Krakish, (Musta)  
Musta-Krakish, (Musta)  
Musta-Krakish, (Musta)  
Musta-Krakish, (Musta)

Awaken, awaken, awaken, awaken,  
Take the land, that must be taken.  
Awaken, awaken, awaken, awaken,  
Devour worlds, smite forsaken

Rise up from your thousand year-old sleep,  
Break forth from your grave eternally.

Weak will die and land will all be burned  
Musta-Krakish king and death to worlds.

I command you to  
Rise, rise, rise, rise, rise, rise, rise, rise,  
Rise, rise, rise, rise, rise, rise, rise, rise,  
And awaken.

-zap-

(with the FMA crew)

-ZAP-

(with the LoZ characters at Hyrule Castle)

-Link and Zelda are JUST getting back from their honeymoon-

-ZAP-

(with all of the DEATH NOTE characters)

-ZAP-

(with all of the DMC characters except for Arkhom, Mundus, and a few others)

-Lady and Virgil are sitting next to each other, Lady holds Virgil's hand-

Virgil: ((OO)) (blushing, with a state of shock…then…slight happiness and a bit of longing…)

-ZAP-

(back at the TV set)

-there are now fanperson-proof barriers trapping the Fanpeople in their respective cages-

KoR: -checking a pocket watch- any minute now…

-ZAP-

-all the characters listed in the scenes before this one are now on the set, and a barrier prevents them from leaving-

KoR: Welcome back to…

Shiro: the one and only…

Hanabi: the greatest truth, what if's, and/ or dare talk show on …

KoR, Shiro, and Hanabi: the Random Kingdom Talk Show!!

Some random guy: season two.

Cloud: but-again!? But we're free!

KoR: CORRECTION! YOU'RE FREE FROM SEASON ONE. THIS IS SEASON TWO!!

Shiro, Hanabi, and KoR: that's right! Here, you, the reader/viewer, or the host(s) , can "dare" anyone of the characters (except for the three that are saying this) to do anything or "ask" them any question! However, only a host may dare/ask one of his/her co-hosts. And if you (the one that is dared/asked a question) doesn't do the dare or truthfully answer the question, you have the choice of entering either the cage of Fangirls –points to that cage- or the cage of Fanboys –points to that cage-!

all: OO

KoR: and you and the characters can also ask "what if" questions too! I'll start off this new season! Itachi! I dare you to- -

Itachi: -starts making out with Ayame (from Naruto)-

KoR: O.o how did he know I was about to dare him to do that?

Shiro: . does it matter? :) Tobi! I dare you to bitchslap Ronan!

Tobi: -does so-

Hanabi: Roxas! I dare you to- -

Roxas: -starts making out with Namine-

Hanabi: AGAIN!? …oh well…

a/n

we'll be right back soon!

end a/n


	2. Baklava

A/n

A/n

well…I guess I'll give you guys what you want…but from now on, I won't be adding any more chapters to this fanfic unless I get some reviews.

end of a/n

KoR: I guess I have to start this off again… as usual…Vincent Valentine, I dare you to- -

Vincent: -starts making out with Yuffie-

KoR: how did he know- -

Cloud: actually that was a lucky guess because so many authors got them into some kind of relationship…

Shiro: wait before we go on, I'd like to introduce the newest addition to the show, Tadayuki, Anzu!

-a strange and semi-futuristic ninja about Shiro and Hanabi's age walks on the set and stands next to Shiro.-

Anzu: thank you Shiro-samma! But I think you should go first.

Shiro: you don't have to call me "samma" but alright I guess I will. –goes to the "What if…" machine- what if Itachi never killed his family? –pulls the lever-

What if machine: -shows an image of Itachi and Ayame's from Naruto wedding-

Itachi and Ayame: -stares at each other (while blushing) and than looks away from each other (still blushing)-

Hanabi: Itachi! I dare you to make a Baklava for everyone on the set, like you did during the commercials in the original talk show.

Itachi: okay…-the necessary items appear-

(four hours later)

Itachi: wearing a white cooking apron and a chef hat- its ready!

Everyone: -takes a piece, starts eating-

Naruto: It's almost as good as Hinata-chan's cooking!

Hinata: -blush-

Anzu: -finishing his baklava- okay Shiro! I dare you to pull the switch!

Shiro: -does so-

(with all of the .hack/gu / .hack/roots characters)

zap

(with the God of War characters)

zap

(back on the set)

zap

-all of the previously mentioned characters appear on set-

GoW and .hack characters: OO –looks around- oh no…not again…

a/n

seriously, give me some reviews, or else I won't continue!

end of a/n


	3. Host make out contest

~a/n~

~a/n~

FINALLY! Someone reviewed!

~end of a/n~

KoR: -walks in with a review- okay let's see who this one is…

"IM BACK!  
I dare cloud to shave Sephiroth BALD!  
Sora...Hit Sasuke with the keyblade.  
KISAME YOUR DENTAL WORK IS OVER DUE (pulls out chainsaw) GET OVER HERE!  
I dare Naruto to summon Gamabunta to sit on Xemnas.  
BYE.  
Dragonlord" …Dragonlord! When did he get involved with the stories again!? I haven't heard from him since the last talk show!

Sephiroth: looks at cloud, who is taking out an electric razor/clippers, then reaches for Massamune, only to find that it is gone!- OO (gulp)

Cloud: :)

Sephiroth: -starts running around, screaming, as Cloud chases him with the Razor/clippers, whilst cackling maniacally-

Sora: -does his dare while Sasuke is distracted by watching Cloud and Sephiroth-

Naruto: summoning jutsu! –Gamabunta lands on Xemnas-

Cloud finally catches Sephiroth and shaves his head

Sephiroth: TT

Cloud: XD

KoR: -shoves Kisame through a portal that leads to an area directly in front of Dragonlord- Itachi! I dare you to send Dragonlord some of that baklava that was left over from the previous chapter!

Itachi: -does so-

Shiro: -takes pity on Sephiroth- Your Royally Random Majesty…I dare you to give Seph back his hair…

KoR: -understands, snaps his fingers and Seph has hair back-

Sephiroth: ^^ thank you Shiro thankyouthankyouthankyou! –hugs him-

Shiro: GET OFF!

Sephiroth: -does so-

Hanabi: Shiro-kun I dare you to - -

Shiro: you don't even have to dare or even ask me to…-kisses Hanabi-

Hanabi: kisses back-

-this eventually turns into a make-out contest that lasts for hours-

Anzu: I dare this chapter to end so the make out contest can end more quickly!

~a/n~

and it shall

~end of a/n~


	4. Fantasia Devil and Triforce Slash

~a/n~

~a/n~

(at end of the World from Kingdom Hearts)

The Fantasia Devil's theme starts playing as he starts to appear again

Zap

~end of a/n~

KoR: -comes in bearing to reviews- okay everyone, here's the first of two reviews. "im always looking for these kinds of fics..  
I dare Sephiroth to hurt the pale one (points to Orochimaru)  
Kiba, I dare you to get pimp slapped by the author.  
Kisame...here's my bill for the dental workXD  
Shikamaru, get us all a pizza.  
Link...Ganondork is peeping on all the girls... including Zelda.  
So how's my favorite author doin?  
Bye  
Dragonlord" well, I guess that's why he only reviewed the talk shows…

Sephiroth: >:)

Orochimaru: don't you touch me…

Sephiroth: I don't have to…Sin…

Shiro: don't kill him…that's my job…

Sephiroth: okay….SIN HEARTLESS ANGEL!

- black halo appears above Orochimaru's head-

Orochimaru: you bast…-the last thing he feels is pain, then nothing…and just before his death, he utters the name of Shiro's mother-

Shiro: KoR, create a portal to…you know where…

KoR: -does so-

Shiro: -drags Sephiroth through after rendering him unconscious-

(???)

Sephiroth: -wakes up bound to a chair with sound-proof headphones next to, but not on, his ears- where am I?

Shiro: you're awake! Now the true torture shall begin…

Sephiroth: I'm the king of torture! You've got nothing on me you brat!

Shiro: -snaps his fingers and a boombox appears-

Sephiroth: O o what is that?

Shiro: presses play, then repeat all, then runs back through the portal as HER album starts to play-

Sephiroth: OO (recognizes the voice of the singer) no…nooo……IT'S PARIS HILTON'S ALBUM! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! REEEEEEEEEET! (the sound of a dying cockroach) RRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEETTTT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(back with us)

Shiro: close it! Quick!

KoR: -closes the portal then puts baby powder on his hands and slaps Kiba-

Kisame: 1,000,000 yen!?

Shikamaru: -talking on the phone- hello, can I get 25 large (insert toppings here) pizzas and (insert number her) curry slurpies?

(other end): coming right up! And I'm watching the show right now and I can see you right across the street from us, so don't worry about the address!

Link: >:( -dual wielding the Master Sword and the Great Fairies' sword with Fierce Deity Link from Majora's Mask-

Gannondorf: (hears Link say "oh Ganondork!", stops peeping and turns around to see the two links previously mentioned- (gulp) OO

The Two Links: -traps Ganondorf with the power of two triforces of courage- DOUBLE…-prepares to attack- TRIFORCE……..SLAAAAAASSSHHH!!!!! –unleashes an onslaught of slashes, this goes on for about five minutes, then they finish it with a super-charged slash, completing the Final Smash-

Ganondorf: -is launched to were the Fantasia Devil is, then sees it- oh crap…

(back with us)

both links go back to normal, then the OoT and Twilight Princess Zelda's come out and hugs and kisses their respective Link, overjoyed (repeatedly)

Links: -blushing furiously- _that aught to teach him to mess with my wife, Zelda…_

KoR: well Dragonlord, I'm doing good so far…I think…

Audience: just get on with it!

KoR: and now for the next review! "Hm. . .

I dare Sasuke to run around the room screaming 'The tomato people are  
coming, the tomato people are coming!' while flapping his arms like a  
chicken." Wait a sec… this is from Deidara-kun Fangirl aka Temporarily in Hiding…

Deidara: _f-ck! Not her again!_

Sasuke: -does his dare whilst Sakura joins in-

KoR: Itachi I dare you to - -

Itachi: -starts making out with Ayame from Naruto-

KoR: AGAIN!?

Shiro: Naruto I dare you to - -

Naruto: -starts making out with Hinata-

Shiro: let me guess…there has been so many NaruHina Fanfics that he was able to guess that one?

Hanabi: yup…Daisy Duke I dare you to –whispers in Daisy's ear-

Daisy Duke: -hits Hojo from Final Fantasy 7 with a phone book-

Anzu: Kratos I dare you and Athena and your wife to have a - - - - - - - - -

~a/n~

we're ending the chapter early for censorship's sake

~end of a/n~


	5. magic slap and the two chickens

~a/n~

~a/n~

how many of you recognize this one: _**ACHNARASH HALLUB ADVUU!! **_–HERES SOUNDS OF "BBRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS…"- O.O -.- I got the wrong incantation…

~end of a/n~

KoR: okay once again two reviews…first one reads "well...never thought Shikamaru would actually get the pizza…  
Kisame...I expect the pay in the next chapter.  
SORA! RIKUS PEEPIN ON KAIRI!  
Kyuubi, I dare you to take this melon and throw it at...PEIN!  
baklava good O.o  
everybody meet my intern Nobody foot soldier  
Hi...  
I dare every one to rip Orochimaru and Kabuto apart  
Dragonlord and Nobody foot soldier OUT!"

Kisame: -takes out a checkbook and starts writing down the required info, then puts it in an envelope, seals it, and sends it to Dragonlord-

Sora: -sees Riku peeping on Kairi, goes into Final Form with ultima weapon and oathkeeper- oh RIKU!!

Riku: what? Can't you see I'm busy? –turns around only to get whacked with both keyblades and is sent to the Fantasia Devil- oh crap

Pein: -already has a broken melon on his head- -.-

Itachi: yes baklava is very good…

-five minutes later…-

Orochimaru and Kabuto are on the floor, ripped into google plex pieces- (google plex is a number so large, it would take three sheets of paper the size of Bound Brook, NJ's high school's parking lot to write down at a normal 12-point font size.)

KoR: and the last one reads "Oh! I just had a wonderful idea!

I dare Deidara and Itachi to both wear extremely pink and frilly/poufy  
dresses! And let their hair down! And to do their best Valley Girls  
impression!" this one is from Temporarily in Hiding!

-Deidara and Itachi can be seen closing the door on the Fangirl cage.-

(the Fantasia Devil)

Riku suddenly stops after colliding with Ganondorf

R and G: ow!

Ganondorf: let me guess…you were peepin on one or more of the girls…

Riku: and you got knocked all the way here…

R and G: yup…

(back with us)

KoR: -goes over to the "what if" machine- what if I were the guardian of Necronomicon Ex Mortis instead of Shiro? –pulls the lever-

Wim: -shows a scene of hell on earth-

Shiro: -takes out a hot sauce bottle who's label is censored cause I forgot the brand name, but it makes Tabasco seem mild- Kyuubi, I dare you to drink this.

Kyuubi: okay… -snatches bottle and chugs the whole thing- aaaaahhhhhhhh …….-things really start to heat up…- eh? O.O-steam starts coming out of every part of his body and his breath starts to become like fire- AAAAAAAAGGGHHHHHHHHHHH! WWWAAAAAAAAATTTTTEEEEEEERRRRRRR!!!WWWWWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!-a huge bucket of water appears and it chugs the whole darn thing, a hissing sound can be heard- aaaahhhhhh…..-cools back down- what's so funny?

Hanabi: hey Shiro, I just remembered something…where's Sephiroth?

Shiro: oh that's right! _Sh-t!_ –a portal appears and he goes through it-

(???)

Shiro appears again wearing sound proof head phones and smashes the boombox from last chapter, along with the album.

Sephiroth: -still bound to the chair and traumatized- thank you thank you THANK YOOOUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!!

Shiro: -takes off the head phones and drags the chair (and Sephiroth) through the portal-

(back with us)

Shiro: I'm back and here's Sephiroth!

Sephiroth: -no longer in the chair but in the fetal position- no more Paris Hilton…no more Paris Hilton… make her go away mommy PLEASE no more Paris Hilton…

Cloud: what the f-ck did you do to him!?

Shiro: I made him listen to Paris Hilton…

KoR: -he and Shiro are now facing each other, slaps his hand and Shiro's head moves in the opposite direction of the slap, a hand print visible on Shiro's face, KoR slaps again and again and the process repeats itself and the mark becomes more clear, and in between slaps he says "don't –slap- you –slap- ever –slap- force –slap- someone –slap- to –slap- listen –slap- to –slap – HER, –slap- Because –slap- its –slap- just –slap- not –slap- right! –slap- -slap- -clap, and Shiro's head moves as if looking up, and it looks like his head grew two sizes (and feels like it too)-"-

Shiro: fine I won't!

Hanabi: KoR! I dare you to not use that "magic slap" thing on Shiro-kun ever again!

KoR: -sounding depressed" okaayy…….

Anzu: Zetsu! I dare you to throw Orochimaru-temme's body into the Fanboy cage!

Zetsu: -does as he is dared-

~a/n~

for those of you who did not/ did recognize the a/n at the head of this chapter, I used it in my first story, "A Day in the Life of Akatsuki".


	6. Make out talk show

~a/n~

~a/n~

come on, at least tell other people about this talk show so I can get more reviews. At least put it in the forums.

~end of a/n~

KoR: okay first review. This one is from Temporally in Hiding. "I dare Zetsu to eat Hidan. Whole."

Zetsu: CHOMP!!!!!

ALL: O.O ZOMG! Hidan's gone!

KoR: next review. "Dude! You forgot about the .//hack characters (I am a new addict to the  
series) If I could, I would totally dare Haseo to either a) make out with  
Atoli or Shino (from .hack//) (der) b) go up to Sasuke and say "Look we both have chicken - -  
hair!" (they look so alike) or c) go up to Endrance and kiss him just to - -  
Sakubo off. That's all, just some suggestions XD. I LOVE THIS FANFIC BY THE WAY:)" it's signed "Lazyroamer"

Haseo: _Endrance, no. Shino, we broke up long ago, and I'm already over her. Atoli, I do love her but what if she doesn't feel the same way? That leaves just one option…_-walks up to Sasuke- HEY! WE BOTH HAVE CHICKEN BUTT HAIR!

Atoli: -pushes her way through to Haseo and…-smooch-

Haseo: -in utter shock-…_Atoli…_-kisses back-

The kiss ends up turning into another make out contest…quickly.

Shino: …-under her breath- so you've finally moved on…I feel so happy for you…

KoR: …crap…there goes my dare…

Shiro: Sasuke! I dare you to- -

Sasuke: -starts making out with Sakura-

Hanabi: Naruto I dare you to - -

Naruto: -starts making out with Hinata-

Anzu: Inuyasha I dare you to- -

Inuyasha: -starts making out with Kagome-

All: why does this keep happening!?

~a/n~

seriously, I need more reviewers.

~end of a/n~


	7. Ziggy Zaggy Ziggy Zaggy HOY HOY HOY!

~a/n~

……aw f-ck I can't think of anything for the a/n other than "get me more readers!"

~end of a/n~

KoR: okay first review/ its from Temporarily in Hiding. "I dare . . . ah f-, I can't think of anything . . . I dare Sesshomaru to come  
up with a completely evil and diabolical dare for Inuyasha. And no, it can't  
be for him to make out with anyone!"

Sesshomaru: Inuyasha I dare you to –whispers in Inuyasha's ear-

Inuyasha: why don't we save that for the point between this chapter and the next?

Sesshomaru: okay…

KoR: this next one is from Lazyroamer. "Hrm, Okay, I dunno, I'm out of ideas, (day before Halloween!) That spurred  
something. Dare Ron to hug a giant spider! Happy Halloween!"

Ron: -he and Hermione are seen going into the Fangirl cage-

KoR: this next one is from my regular talk show reviewer, whom we all know. "Well...has anyone seen my intern?  
Inuyasha, I dare you to kick Orochimaru in the balls!  
so Kisame... how is the wallet?  
Roxas... you know you want to hurt Xemnas for swearing in front of everyone.  
Who wants to play Texas hold em?  
Hey...where's my wallet...  
bye, gotta find my intern AND my wallet...  
Dragonlord"

Link: well…that explains what this is…-takes out a billfold- found it in the review when you came in at the previous episode (chapter)

KoR: -snaps his fingers, and the wallet goes back to it's rightful owner-

Inuyasha: sneaks up behind Orochimaru and kicks him where the sun don't shine-

Orochimaru: gyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!!! Omg I don't think there'll be any more Orochimarus any time soon!

Shiro: come on old man, you're too old to have kids anymore…

Inuyasha: hey Orochimaru!

Orochimaru: what do you want!?

Inuyasha: you just got kicked in the nuts. XD

Kisame: it's doing fine no thanks to you…

Roxas: _crap! Dragonlord does have a point…I DO want to hurt Mansex…really badly…_

Xemnas: achoo!

All: -stares at Xemnas-

Xemnas: what? I just got the feeling that someone's been calling me Mansex, due to the fact that I rape one member of Organization XIII every night…

KoR: Xemnas, I dare you to tell us who the next victim is.

Xemnas: Saix…

Saix: having heard this after getting back from the bathroom, his face lost all color and his expression went straight to fear…extreme fear-

Shiro: Xemnas, I dare you to not rape anyone till they make Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows, the video game and Space Balls the video game.

Xemnas: -can be seen closing the door on the Fangirl cage-

Hanabi: Orochimaru, as punishment for all the things you've done, I hereby dare you to listen to Paris Hilton for the entire next chapter!

Orochimaru: okay, how bad can it be?

Sephiroth: you don't want to know…

Anzu: -takes out a full two-liter bottle of Coca-cola- I dare myself to start the greatest of chants ever used on The Man Show…Ziggy-zaggy-Ziggy-zaggy-oi-oi-oi. Ziggy-zaggy-zaggy-oi-oi-oi…

Hanabi, Shiro, and KoR: -join in- Ziggy-zaggy-Ziggy-zaggy-oi-oi-oi. Ziggy-zaggy-zaggy-oi-oi-oi…

Naruto characters: -also join in- Ziggy-zaggy-Ziggy-zaggy-oi-oi-oi. Ziggy-zaggy-zaggy-oi-oi-oi…

Inuyasha Characters: -also join in- Ziggy-zaggy-Ziggy-zaggy-oi-oi-oi. Ziggy-zaggy-zaggy-oi-oi-oi…

Zelda and Final Fantasy characters: -also join in- Ziggy-zaggy-Ziggy-zaggy-oi-oi-oi. Ziggy-zaggy-zaggy-oi-oi-oi…

everyone else on set: -also join in- Ziggy-zaggy-Ziggy-zaggy-oi-oi-oi. Ziggy-zaggy-zaggy-oi-oi-oi…

the readers: Ziggy-zaggy-Ziggy-zaggy-oi-oi-oi. Ziggy-zaggy-zaggy-oi-oi-oi…

Trogdor: Ziggy-zaggy-Ziggy-zaggy-oi-oi-oi. Ziggy-zaggy-zaggy-oi-oi-oi…

(all the worlds)

all: Ziggy-zaggy-Ziggy-zaggy-oi-oi-oi. Ziggy-zaggy-zaggy-oi-oi-oi…

(back with us)

Ziggy-zaggy-Ziggy-zaggy-oi-oi-oi. Ziggy-zaggy-zaggy-oi-oi-oi…

Anzu: -stops chanting and starts to chug the coke-

Ziggy-zaggy-Ziggy-zaggy-oi-oi-oi. Ziggy-zaggy-zaggy-oi-oi-oi…

Ziggy-zaggy-Ziggy-zaggy-oi-oi-oi. Ziggy-zaggy-zaggy-oi-oi-oi…

Anzu: -finishes-

All: (as Anzu finishes) Ziggy-zaggy-ziggy-zaggy oi oi oi Ziggy zaggy Ziggy zaggy OI OI OI!!!

~a/n~

I LOVE that chant!

~end of a/n~


	8. business check one

~a/n~

why am I not getting any reviews!? Should I increase the randomness? Or should I get Riku and Ganondorf back from the Fantasia Devil? Or maybe I should change the rating so that nothing can be without description except for rape issues and yaoi, because I don't do yaoi. I'll give the choice to you. Tell me in a review. However, the votes/suggestions will not be included when I read the reviews to the readers of this fanfic.

~end of a/n~

KoR: no reviews!? This sucks.

All but the hosts (KoR, Anzu, Shiro, and Hanabi): _yes!!_

KoR: but you know what? We, the hosts still get to give dares, questions, and what if questions! ^^

All but the hosts (KoR, Anzu, Shiro, and Hanabi): _NOOOOOOOOO!_

KoR: then again, we could go an episode (chapter) without them to stress the importance of the reviews…

All but the hosts (KoR, Anzu, Shiro, and Hanabi): _whew…_

The Hosts: we will not do any episodes (chapters) after this without reviews! Reviews are what keep this talk show running! The only episodes (chapters) that can go without the reviews are "business checks", which shouldn't even be considered episodes (chapters)!…-goes on rambling about how important reviews are to this story for about two to three hours- and that's why reviews are so important to this talk show!

~a/n~

well, that's why I need the reviews! More reviews equals longer, better, and more insanely random chapters!

~end of a/n~


	9. ziggyzaggy of the Fox

~a/n~

guys, you really need to tell more people about this fanfic. I need more reviews!

~end of a/n~

KoR: finally some reviews! This one's from Lazyroamer. "I dare Itachi and Sasuke to replay the scene from Charley and the Unicorn  
where:

"Look Charley! I have the magical amulet!"

"Amulet?"

"See! Sparkle Sparkle!"

"Sp-sparkle!" (Itachi is Charley!)

I dare Daisey Duke to paint the car (I forgot the name but its orange) Hot  
pink and the strips and decorations bright colors.

Okay's, that's all I got at the moment."

Itachi and Sasuke: -they do the dare-

Daisey: -closes the door on the Fangirl cage instead of the Fanboy cage-

KoR: this other one is from Temporarily in Hiding.

All but the hosts: -shudders- _what is she going to dare (us) to do now!?_

KoR: "I dare EVERYONE to do the chicken dance."

All: ………………………..

-chicken dance song starts playing and they start dancing, this goes on for about an hour-

KoR: okay –pant- that's enough…Shiro, I dare you to stop that record player!

Shiro: -removes the needle from the record player and the chicken dance song stops playing, everyone stops dancing- Hanabi, I dare you to pull the lever again.

Hanabi: -pulls the lever on the machine that got them all here, and "the Fox" from The Man Show appears with a zap- Anzu-san I dare you to dare the Fox to start the chant.

Anzu: OH FOX, I DARE YOU TO START THE ZIGGY-ZAGGY CHANT!

The Fox: -takes out five pint glasses of beer- ZIGGY-ZAGGY-ZIGGY-ZAGGY HOY, HOY, HOY! ZIGGY-ZAGGY, ZIGGY-ZAGGY HOY HOY HOY!…

All that first joined the chant the first time I, the author, used it:: -joins in again-

All: ZIGGY ZAGGY ZIGGY ZAGGY HOY HOY HOY! ZIGGY ZAGGY ZIGGY ZAGGY HOY HOY HOY!!!

The Fox: -chugs the beer glasses one by one at lightning speed, all are downed in a flash- THANK YOU! GOOD NIGHT!!

~a/n~

so what do you think?

~end of a/n~


	10. Make out world

~a/n~

Stewie Griffin from Family Guy: -looking at a TV, which is just showing static- they're here…

Me: who?

Stewie: the TV people…

~end of a/n~

KoR: first review. "I'm back and I found my intern who apparently wants to kill/maim Xemnas and  
Orochimaru...  
he wrote that they are to be fed liquid laxatives and are forced to watch  
barney, telatubbies, and Dora the explorer...  
every one else gets a 5 day vacation to destiny islands (OR Las Vegas (if they  
are over 18).)  
Zabuza... the Dental chair calls you...  
later!  
I'm no longer up to my eyeballs in homework!  
Dragonlord and nobody foot soldier" good for you, lord of Dragons!…huh?

-Orochimaru and Mansex (Xemnas) are being force-fed Laxatives by Shiro and his nobody, Demyx, they swallow them-

Shiro and Demyx: -takes them to the same place where Sephiroth was being forced to listen to Paris Hilton's singing, binds them to chairs, a TV and a DVD player appear, Shiro puts in "best of Barney, The Telatubbies, and Dora the Explorer" in the DVD player and selects "play all" then Gets the f-ck out of there-

Screams can be heard from the place

Zabuza: _Dragonlord must really have something against the 7 Swordsmen of the Mist…oh well…time to face the music_…-goes to Dragonlord's dental chair and sits in it-

All: when does the vacation start?

KoR: as soon as this episode (chapter) is over.

All: aww…

KoR: Sephiroth I dare you to go to where Riku and Ganondorf are (i.e. the Fantasia Devil) and get them back here. I think they've suffered enough…and if you don't, instead of the Fanpeople, I'll make you listen to HER!

Sephiroth: -warps to the Fantasia Devil, grabs Ganondorf and Riku, then warps back, and throws them onto the two nearest couch.-

Shiro: Sora I dare you to - -

Sora: -starts making out with Kairi-

Hanabi: big sister I dareth ye to - -

Hinata: starts making out with Naruto-

Anzu: Sai I dare you to - -

Sai: -starts making out with Ino-

Hachibi no Yamata no Orochi: Vincent I dare you to - -

Vincent Valentine: -starts making out with Yuffie-

Necronomicon Ex Mortis: Shikamaru I dare you to- -

Shikamaru: -starts making out with Temari-

~a/n~

wait-wait-wait-wait! Why the f-ck did I just make a lot of people suddenly make out!?

Jeff Dunham: (with all of his Dummies (puppets (he's a Ventriloquist)) I don't know how did my wife make me drive our Preas home from the dealer's?

~end of a/n~


	11. Itachi sings like Bob Seger

~a/n~

this goes to my three most loyal and consistent reviewers: Dragonlord, Temporarily in Hiding (aka Deidara-kun Fangirl), and Lazyroamer. tell other people about this fanfic! I need more reviewers!

Oh and I will be referencing a Naruto Parody Video Series called "Naruto Randomness".

~a/n~

KoR: first review is from Lazyroamer. "Hm, Okay, what if Sarutobi never ordered Itachi to kill the Uchiha clan?

I dare Link to sing the Llama song!" I never heard of that song and am to lazy to get the lyrics, so I'm not gonna make you do that one link.

Shiro: -pulls the lever on the "what if" machine- what if Itachi wasn't ordered to kill the Uchiha Clan?

What if machine: -shows an image of Itachi and Ayame from Naruto about to get married, with Sasuke as best man and Sakura as the Made of Honor, as well as Shiro as ring bearer and Hanabi as "flower girl" (could have seen that one coming) "do you, Uchiha, Itachi take Ayame to be your wife?" says the priest. "I do" "do you, Ayame take Itachi to be your husband?" "I do" "by the powers invested in thee, I pronounce you 'man and wife'. You may kiss the bride." –Itachi and Ayame kiss (on the screen)-

(back with us)

Itachi and Ayame are beyond blushing at this point

KoR: an other review from Lazyroamer, but for a different chapter. "dare (if you've seen higarashi no koko ni ki you'll know where this is  
from) someone to pull off all of someone else's fingernails. (sorry feeling  
sadistic today don't have to do this dare if you want) I also dare someone to  
knock out Lee before he and Gai start going off on a huge long rant about  
youth and "LEE! GAI SENSEI!"

That's all. Cia next time."

Shiro: -using the powers of Necronomicon Ex Mortis, speaks an incantation in which Orochimaru's fingernails come flying off of his fingers as he makes a blood curdling scream, and is then transported to a medical facility.-

Captain Lonestar from Spaceballs: -uses the "Vulcan Neck Pinch" to knock out both Lee and Gai-

KoR: this next one is from Dragonlord. "Well... never expected teeth like this Zabuza...when was the last time you  
saw a dentist...because your teeth are in perfect condition. Have a sucker  
/o.o\  
How was the vacation...where is that one gambler nobody?  
Sora... when was the last time you saw your mom?  
I still say baklava GOOD! ^o^  
Good night!  
Dragonlord  
P.S. if anyone finds a pair of car keys...they are mine...gotta stop loosing  
stuff."

Zabuza: well I actually take the time to brush and floss and use mouthwash a total of three or more times per day! ^^

All: it was great! ^^ thanks!

Luxord: I'm right here! (the amount of money he has is about half as tall as mount Everest and as wide as the Mariana Trench!-

Sora: about the same day I got back from the World that Never Was.

Itachi: -still blushing from the what if question- I-I'm g-g-glad y-you l-liked it…_ I still can't believe she would've felt the same way about me as I do about her…_

Bill Sikes: -takes out some keys to a Toyota Preass (sp?)- that explains what these are…

Shiro: -snatches them and gives them to Dragonlord-

KoR: Shiro, I dare you to…you know what…

Shiro: -passes along the chain dare to Hanabi, who passes it on to Anzu-

Anzu: Itachi I dare you to Sing "Old Time Rock 'n Roll" by Bob Seger!

Itachi: grabs a Microphone, goes off stage and is joined by Demyx and his Sitar, Sasuke and a bass guitar, and a drum set appears as some random drummer goes off stage-

-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-dum –Demyx slides back on stage facing away from the camera- doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-dum –same as Sasuke- doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-dum –same as the Drummer, but he's holding drumsticks and is behind the drum set- doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-dum –Itachi slides back on, in the middle- song begins, and abboud face!- -

Itachi: Just take those old records off the shelf  
I'll sit and listen to 'em by myself  
Today's music ain't got the same soul  
I like that old time rock 'n' roll  
Don't try to take me to a disco  
You'll never even get me out on the floor  
In ten minutes I'll be late for the door  
I like that old time rock 'n' roll

Still like that old time rock 'n' roll  
That kind of music just soothes the soul  
I reminisce about the days of old  
With that old time rock 'n' roll  
Won't go to hear them play a tango  
I'd rather hear some blues or funky old soul  
There's only sure way to get me to go  
Start playing old time rock 'n' roll  
Call me a relic, call me what you will  
Say I'm old-fashioned, say I'm over the hill  
Today' music ain't got the same soul  
I like that old time rock 'n' roll

Still like that old time rock 'n' roll  
That kind of music just soothes the soul  
I reminisce about the days of old  
With that old time rock 'n' roll

(repeats chorus two times and eventually fades out)

Tobi is that my web cam!?

Tobi: maybe…-runs to a PC and posts the recorded stuff on Youtube.-

Itachi: I'll get you for this- - -gets "Vulcan Neck Pinched" by Capt. Lonestar-

Lonestar: sweet dreams!

~a/n~

yes the song was the reference, including the part about Itachi singing it, but not the other parts such as the guitarist/sitarist, bassist, and drummer, and it was the youngest version of Sasuke holding the web cam, and it was before Itachi was in ANBU black ops. Go to Youtube and look up "Naruto Randomness" for better Idea of what it looks like.

~end of a/n~


	12. yellow submarine

~a/n~

we all live in a yellow submarine, a yellow submarine, a yellow submarine. 

We all live in a yellow submarine, a yellow submarine, a yellow submarine.

~end of a/n~

KoR: the only review is from Temporarily in Hiding. "Shame on you for never hearing the Llama Song! I dare Itachi to MAKE you look  
it up and thus proceed with Lazyroamer's dare for Link!"

Itachi: _if I do, he'll ruin my life! If I don't, the Fangirls will steal my virginity! Unless…unless I take Ayame in there with me…_-snatches up Ayame and goes into the Fangirl cage to make out with her, which she had wanted ever since she first saw Itachi-

KoR: you know what? Link, I dare you to sing Yellow Submarine by the Beatles instead of Llama song!

Link: In the town where i was born,  
There lived a man,  
Who sailed the seas,  
And he told us of his life,  
In the land of Submarines,  
So we sailed into the sun,  
Till' we found a sea of green,  
And we lived beneath the waves,  
In our yellow submarine,

-Chorus-

We all live in a yellow submarine,  
A yellow submarine,  
A yellow submarine,  
We all live in a yellow submarine,  
A yellow submarine,  
A yellow submarine.

And my friends are all aboard,  
Many more of them live next door,  
And the band begins to play,  
( a band plays a short song )

-Chorus-

We all live in a yellow submarine,  
A yellow submarine,  
A yellow submarine,  
We all live in a yellow submarine,  
A yellow submarine,  
A yellow submarine.

And we live a life of ease,  
Everyone of us,  
Has all we need,  
Sky of blue (echo) Sky of blue  
And sea of green (echo) Sea of green  
In our yellow (echo) In our yellow  
Submarine (echo) submarine!

-Chorus-

We all live in a yellow submarine,  
A yellow submarine,  
A yellow submarine,  
We all live in a yellow submarine,  
A yellow submarine,  
A yellow submarine.

-fades out as chorus is repeated-

Shiro: First Hokage, I dare you to make a "mushroom cloud".

First Hokage: -creates a HUGE tree, then makes it go boom after a nuke falls into it, with the blast being a safe distance away-

Hanabi: Vaan, I dare you to - -

Vaan: -starts making out with Penelo-

Anzu: Ashe I dare you to - -

Ashe: -starts making out with Basch (sp?)-

~a/n~

ha I just got out of having to look up something that sounds so stupid and replaced one dare with another! XD

~end of a/n~


	13. business check two

~a/n~

an army of prinnies walks in (prinnies are penguin-like demons with peg-legs, and wears a pouch in which it holds two machetes (or fish), and any kind of explosives of their choosing. If you throw one, it WILL explode. Also, almost every other word they say is "dood" or "ssu", and they are made from the souls of those who had lived lives not worthy of after-life, such as that of a murderer.)

Prinnies: come on dood! His Royally Random Majesty needs some reviews to continue this talk show dood! SSU!

Me: -grabs a prinny and throws it, it explodes on impact- man those guys are annoying…why does Anzu have to have so many of them?

~end of a/n~

KoR: no reviews… you know what that means…Hiashi what would you think of Naruto and Hinata getting married?

Hiashi: _oh sh-t! if I give the wrong answer, my life will be ruined!_ I wouldn't dwell on it too much, but I guess it may as well happen…the Beakugan can read thoughts and emotions so I already know Hinata will go all emo if they don't, and I'm finally getting to se the good in him, so they have my blessing.

KoR:…wouldn't have it any other way…

Hiashi: _whew,,,_

KoR: anyway, Shiro, how many reviews do we have so far?

Shiro:1…2………12 sir.

KoR: whaaat!? Only twelve!? Somebody put this talk show in the forums! I need more reviews! Any flames?

Hanabi: no sir.

KoR: good. Now lets end this episode (chapter).

Anzu: KoR owns nothing but Shiro and me- -

A prinny walks up to Anzu.

Hiashi: a prinny! Can I keep it PLEASE!?

Anzu: -throws the prinny into the twilight zone.-

Hiashi: aww…..

Another comes up this time to Hiashi.

Anzu: that one you can keep.

Hiashi: yay!

~a/n~

were are my reviewers!?

~end of a/n~


	14. Make out Universe

~a/n~

Jeff Dunham appears with one of his puppets (i.e. Akmehd the Dead Terrorist)

Akmehd: 'ello!! I am Lindsey Lohan! (this next part is sung to "jingle bells") DASHING THROUH THE SAND

WITH A BOMB STRAPED TO MY BACK

I HAVE A NASTY PLAN

FOR CHRISTMAS IN IRAQ

I GOT THROUGH CHECK POINT A

BUT NOT THROUGH CHECKPOINT B-

THAT'S WHEN I GOT SHOT IN THE A- - BY THE U.S. MILITARY!

OOH JINGLE BOMBS, JINGLE BOMBS, MINE BLEW UP YOU SEE,

WHERE ARE ALL THOSE VIRGINS THAT BIN LADEN PROMISED ME?

JINGLE BOMBS, JINGLE BOMBS, YOUR SOLDIERS SHOT ME DEAD, NOW THE ONLY THING THAT I HAVE LEFT IS THIS TOWEL UP ON MY HEAD!

I USED TO BE A MAN,

NOW EVERY TIME I COUGH,

THANKS TO UNCLE SAM,

MY NUTS KEEP FALLING OFF

MY BOMBING DAYS ARE DONE,

I NEED TO FIND SOME WORK-

PERHAPS IT WOULD BE MUCH SAFER AS

A CONVENIENCE STORE NIGHT CLERK!

JINGLE BOMBS, JINGLE BOMBS, I THINK I'VE BEEN SCREWED,

DON'T LAUGH AT ME BECAUSE I'M DEAD OR **I KILL YOU!!** I KILL YOU.

Jeff: your Royally random Majesty- -

(me):say no more Jefuhfuh…on with the new show!

If any of you would like to help with the story, either review or come on down to co-author a story.

~end of a/n~

KoR: WHAT!? NO REVIEWS AGAIN!? YOU ALL KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS!

All: -hopeful- we're done?

KoR: nope! FREELANCING!

All but KoR, Shiro, and Hanabi: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

KoR: throw the switch Mansex!

Xemnas: what was that!?

KoR: I said throw the switch Xemnas!

Xemnas: …come again?

Demyx: I've got this. He said roda(rah-duh) roda throw roda roda the switch!

Xemnas: Okay! why didn't you say so? –pulls the switch on "the machine"-

(at Hellsing Manor, court yard)

It's about 09:30 pm, and everyone is posing for a picture (in Hellsing, vampires still have reflections)

ZAP

(back with us)

ZAP –the Hellsing characters appear-

Alucard: -looks around- oh no…not again…_thank HIM that there aren't any windows…_

KoR: Alucard I dare you to do something that you've always wanted to do since you've met Seras.

Alucard: _finally… a chance to express these feelings for Police Girl that I've kept hidden for so long…_ -walks up to Seras (who is referred to as "Police Girl" by Alucard and Alucard alone), embraces her, and looks deep into her eyes- (telepathically to Seras) _Police Girl, you and only you can choose how far I can go in this situation, but I want you to know this…I…I love you._

_Seras: …………I've waited so long for you to say that…I love you too _–kisses Alucard-

Alucard: -kisses back-

-they start making out whilst walking all the way to the broom closet, the door opens, they "fall" in, and the door closes.-

Shiro: (wanting to continue with this chapter/episode) on a scale of one to ten, ten being the most awkward…

Hanabi: (blushing, thinking of herself and Shiro in Alucard and Seras' place) …that would be…

Anzu: _why does that never happen to me? …_An eleven.

All: …agreed…

:Shiro: now…back…

KoR: …to…

Hanabi: the…

Anzu: show!

Shiro: O great and legendary Fox, lord of the Ziggy-zaggy chant, speed-beer drinking, and singing of dirty songs, I dare you to break those empty beer bottles over the heads of Orochimaru, Mello, Near, and Xemnas, Break this jar of moonshine over Boss Hogg's head, …and get a new liver. You'll really need it.

The Fox: -breaks the beer bottles/ moonshine jar over there respective peoples' heads, then can be seen going into…not the Fangirl cage…not the Fanboy cage… but a surgery chamber with the guys from both "House" and "Scrubs".

Gregory House: nice…I've always wanted to treat the legendary Fox…

Hanabi:_ so Seras, the Fox, and Alucard are all out of the game…for now :). Along with all those people and the Nobody that were knocked out just now._ Let's see…who shall the next victim be…Shiro-kun, read my thoughts using your Rakugan for your dare.

Shiro: -activates his kekei-genkai, his pupils and the whites of his eyes turn blue, starts to read Hanabi's thoughts-

Hanabi: _Shiro-kun, I dare you to –censored-_

Shiro: -walks up to Hanabi, they start making out, then some how wind up in some random (but secluded) place-

Anzu: that was…odd…_again…why does that never happen to me?_ "Uncle Jesse, once boss Hogg wakes up, I dare you to get him in the nuts.

Uncle Jesse: it'll be my pleasure. How about some jokes to pass the time?

There once was a man from Boston

Who was on his way to Austin

He bought a yacht and

Everything else they got

Then his balls fell off and he lost 'em.

All: XD

-the jokes continued for a few hours, then Hogg suddenly woke up-

Hogg: what's so funny?

Uncle Jesse: this…BOW TO THE KING! –back-fists Hogg where the sun don't shine-

Hogg lurches forward, takes a few steps back, falls out a window, lands on a clothes line, nuts first, is shot upward, lands on a fence, also nuts first, gets bitten by a dog where the sun don't shine as he gets off, scares away the dog, then is hit in the nuts and is sent flying by a wrecking ball and is still riding it

Hogg: OO OW MY BALLS!!!

KoR: Idiocracy's "OW MY BALLS!" all over again…

The following people suddenly start making out: Jyraya and Tsunade, Itachi and Ayame, Koga and Ayame from Inuyasha, Inuyasha and Kagome, Sesshomaru and Kagura, Naruto and Hinata, Sasuke and Sakura, Atoli and Haseo, Ino and Sai, and Shikamaru and Sai.

~a/n~

it was probably getting more awkward than random so I had to stop it before it was too late.

~end of a/n~


	15. discontinued

This story has been discontinued due to lack of reviews.


End file.
